Caffeine (a poem) by Danielle Sainte-Marie

by daniellestemarie Email

Now, I do not drink caffeine at all, but one day when I was in a "religious" person's house, I noticed that the amount of coffee, caffeinated drinks, and coffee supplies he had versus the amount of religious writings and accoutrements, was far outweighed by the coffee. So, I thought, "Why not just make coffee your God?" Then, I went home and wrote this poem.

Caffeine
Oh great God of False Energy, what do I owe Thee?
For, Thy already are the Bean Lord,
With angels frantically serving You in plastic and aluminum.
You, a Great Giver of contrived hopes,
Cunningly dehydrating masses of loyal followers—
How Your people shake at the delight of another headache with You!
Oh Dark God of Nervous Beings, what else do I owe Thee?
For, another morning's drink of loyalty whisks away the frustrations of the night,
And addictively reminds us how happy we are,
To be brainwashed by You.

The poem is in the book A Glimpse to Open Pt Eye [I] Deluxe, by me, Danielle Sainte-Marie. Find the book at my website: Official Website of Danielle Sainte-Marie, Books Page



SNL: Breaking Character

by daniellestemarie Email

I have to add my quick two cents here (and I speak for Chloe my wife too): whenever a SNL actor breaks character, we find it delightful. People say the stupidest things, like, "But the joke is ruined when they break character." Well, no it isn't. It's just that the joke that was about to be told got trumped by an even funnier joke: breaking character.

The hopes of someone breaking character is our favorite thing; in fact, it's why we watch the show! Keep up the unexpected laughter!

Autumn World by Danielle Sainte-Marie

by daniellestemarie Email

Leaves fall to the Autumn Dance,
trees and earth spin romance—
as you and I walk along,
into dusk with some forlorn.

Wind pushes your soft auburn hair,
sometimes I have to stare;
jealous at nature for touching you,
while I wish to do so too.

A chill creeps in,
and you offer your arm in pretend;
yet I latch on, happy to be at your side—
wondering about a life as your wife.

I fall then, but no one catches me,
I am in heartbroken misery!
What can I do, oh what can I do?
You may not love me, but I...

And the night goes on,
I find myself alone and gone—
lost in that brief Autumn World,
when, if only for a second, I was your girl.


(From the book A Glimpse to Open Pt Eye [I] Deluxe, available now at Danielle Sainte-Marie.com.)


My Picks for Best Metal Albums of 2017

by daniellestemarie Email

Hello Bangertv and metal fans of other stripes! I am going to give my picks of the best metal albums of 2017 and 2018, right here, right now.

But first, you may ask, 'Who is she and why should I care?' Well, honestly, I don't know that you should care, but let me fill you in on some pertinent details of my life. First, I am a full-time poetess and authoress of over 30 books. My website, daniellesaintemarie.com will fill you in a bit more. I am the daughter of Jim Morrison, and no, I don't care if you believe it or not. It's very true. Second, I am a world-class martial artist in Ninjutsu, having attained the rank of hachi-dan (8th degree black belt), and I have trained with everyone from Hatsumi-sensei to Hayes-sensei to Bud Malstrom-sensei, and Shawn Havens-sensei. I live on my ranch and have my own private dojo.

But third, and probably most important to all you metalheads out there, I am a lover of heavy fucking metal. I have been in love with metal ever since some of its earliest tunes began creeping into my ears. I started out with Judas Priest's Rocka Rolla, which blew my young mind and helped me understand the melancholia of Winter. I then got into the hard rock of AC/DC, with the song Whole Lotta Rosie being a particular favorite. And, over the years, I listened to and studied it all. Grim Reaper's See You in Hell My Friend was played ten thousand times (don't you know, some young punk vandal spray-painted that in two foot high letters across a wall in Shoreham, NY. Now, imagine that! :-)). Celtic Frost, Death, Satan, Exodus, Tank...the list goes on and on. I have filled my soul with metal. And, Judas Priest? Well, I have their logo tattooed on my left arm, and I own every single album. Does that tell you how I feel about them? And, guess what? I found my way into Primal Fear's Nuclear Fire liner notes. When you're a writer you can help with lyrics, it seems. I also became friendly with Al Atkins, the original lead singer of Judas Priest. We shared some quality time discussing the origins of Caviar and Meths. So, that's just a little bit about me.

Before I get to my picks for the best metal records of 2017 and 2018, I want to remind you to support Bangertv and head over to their Patreon site and make a donation.

For the year 2018, I pick the following:

1. Spectral Wound, Infernal Decadence


This is the most unique black metal album I have ever heard. With dissonance drumming and singing in the background, and the sounds of a hulking, mystical, satanic force rising in the foreground, these guys created something that lies really beyond description. Buy this record and sit there mesmerized!

2. The Ocean Collective, Phanerozoic I: Palaeozoic


This band crushed it with this haunting, multi-layered album. We're talking a lush tapestry of different instruments with occasional death growls. This is a record for metalheads who like their music hyper-intelligent, and who just sometimes enjoy kicking back and letting Zen take their thoughts away through music to a wiser, deeper place.

For the year 2017, I pick the following:

1. Satan's Hallow, Satan's Hallow


This band is so amazing that when I first heard this record, I thought I had time-tripped into 1982 and was hearing an album I had missed. Judas Priest and Iron Maiden riffs, big vocals right on the key she's most interested in, and a spooky tale of ghosts. My goddess, this band rips and powers through this album, lighting every song with fire. I cannot wait for their next release. Amazing!

2. Okay, for the final album in this series, I have to go with: Mastodon, Emperor of Sand


Mastodon like to keep it fresh, and experiment. I love this approach, because I do not need my metal to sound the same everytime. I am open to the possibilities of music. This album really was amazing. It had snappy hard-rock-like numbers with intense death metal, all packaged together like a present that would make you bang your head as it strategized on how to eat you. Truly wonderful effort by the mighty Mastodon!

So, that's it, my picks for best metal albums of 2017 and 2018. Many honorable mentions, but if you go back to 2015, pick up Lucifer's Lucifer I, which fuses doom metal and glorious vocals with spectacular song-writing. Lucifer II is also awesome. That is a great band! Okay, see you later and keep your horns flying high and proud!

Movie Lover's Short Movie Reviews: Marian, Again

by daniellestemarie Email

A surprisingly good made-for-TV movie about a man whose former lover had disappeared many years ago, only to resurface now at a local store. He tries to talk to her but her once beautiful face is heavily distressed and she simply runs away. Uncovering the why of it all will take the man through hell, and he may possibly lose his daughter as well. Recommended. Great, shock ending.

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